Hello Summertime. I've Missed You.

It's not officially summer but it certainly feels that way.  This all began a few days ago when the humidity made its heavy way to Tennessee and settled in for sticky, bug-biting, lovely long summer days.  

I do love the seasons.  I love how perfectly and strangely and distinctly different they are.  This is something I have come to appreciate more and more.  Except spring.  Spring is a huge transition for me.  Coming out of the winter gray into chirpy green and blue days.  It's just too much.  My pasty skin practically blinding in the tell-all light of spring.  Then the time change comes along and messes practically everything up; your kids' sleeping, your own sleeping, light.  Suddenly there's too much light.  Wait, what am I supposed to do with all this daytime? Getting cozy on the couch with popcorn and the remote seems wrong.  Lazy.  I should be outside...pulling weeds or some other spring-like task. Spring requires too much.  Okay, like I said, I'm in the process of appreciating all the seasons.  

It's sticky and hot and Friday.  It's a good day.  We had a follow up meeting with the school yesterday.  It went well and I feel like we came to a fair compromise.  But today I feel like everything has been completely drained out of me.  Sucked out of every pore.  I guess I was running on adrenaline.  For more than a week, it kept me going.  Fighting for your kid requires a mental strength that you don't even know you possess.  But you do and you always have.  Ever since you became a mom.  I think it is a gift we are given with the birth of a child.   Superhuman mommy strength!

I'm so glad the meeting went well but I feel as if  I've been studying for a big test and it's finally over.  I've taken it.  Now I don't want to see the book; I don't want to see the teacher.  I don't even want to be happy that it's over because that would involve me thinking about it.  Right now I can't think of it.  I can't talk about it.  

I'm glad it's summer.  Pre-summer summer.  Carefree and flip-floppin'.  Summer always reminds me of orange sherbet.  Whenever we visited my grandparents in the summer we got orange sherbet after dinner.  More exciting than you even know.  Anyway, summer also reminds me of the whippoorwills of my childhood.  The sherbet was the city treat.  The whippoorwills were every night of my youth.  Their long hauntingly beautiful calls, their timing perfect, as twilight turns to the fallen night.  

I'll get on with enjoying the summer and doing summer-like activities.  But right now I'm diffusing.  My fight-or-flight-reaction was strong but now I am weak.  Excuse me while I go get cozy on the couch with popcorn and junior mints.  Even while daylight still exists.  It's dark somewhere.